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Thank you so much to everyone who donated water and Gatorade! We have received more than enough, so please hold off on any additional donations of these items. We are truly grateful for your generosity and support! No more donations needed at this time.

MISSION BRIEFING 006: OPERATION SEASONAL SANITY ATTENTION ON DECK!

I have patrolled the inner sanctum of this municipality—

Bell Street sector—and I am officially declaring a State of Decorative Emergency.

I am witnessing a total breakdown in

Aesthetic

Discipline.

We have a residence sporting a nine-foottall skeleton in the front yard.

Negative, Hamilton. It is not October. It is not “spooky season.” It is “Mow Your Grass and Square Away Your Porch” season. To the indi…

101 N. Rice
PO Box 833
Hamilton, TX 76531
254-386-3145